Friday, January 31, 2014

When's Your Monday?

Monday.  The day every diet begins.  The day you will "start over."

But sometimes, you blow it on Monday.

I was one of these people. Monday will be the day I eat perfectly, I will exercise my ass off, I will do everything perfect.  Perfect. Perfect. Perfect.  Until I would make a poor decision on Monday.  And then I felt like I had failed.  I have said horrible things to myself about these failures.  And then, I shit you not, I would wait until the next Monday to start over.  That made sense to me.  "Well, I've already not done it perfectly so I may as well have another donut."  Every day until next Monday.

Changing the expectation that I have to do this perfectly has been one of the most pivotal changes in thinking I've had.  I don't have to be perfect.  Sometimes I will totally fall off the wagon.  I will totally have a bad day and want a stupid imperfect donut.  But it doesn't negate everything I have been doing.  It doesn't take away all of the other successes I have had.  It just means tomorrow I have to work out maybe a little bit harder and get back on the wagon.  That's the only option for me at this point.  There is no turning back.  There is no quitting.  Never again will I give up on myself.

Even if Monday is a train wreck.  Screw Monday.  Tuesday is a new day.  I don't have to make the same choices on Tuesday. Or Wednesday. There is no diet that I have to succeed at perfectly.  No fast or cleanse that I have to follow to a T.  I am trying to change my life, forever.  My way of thinking, my way of being, forever.

I had to remind myself of this because this past Monday was not a great day for me.  I did not make the best decisions and fell into the trap of feeling really badly about myself.  Then to top it off I got on the scale today.  I'm up 2 pounds.  My once a month weigh in was a complete failure.  But I didn't tail spin.  (Ok. It made me a bit grumpier then I may have been.)  But I got my butt into the gym tonight and had a personal best on my jog.  That's what I have to focus on.  Monday sucked.  Tuesday I tried to rally.  But it's Friday....

And I rocked it today.

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