I HAVE NOT GOTTEN ON THE SCALE IN A WEEK!
This is a big deal for me. I skipped my Wednesday weigh in last week and I'm skipping it today. I had a moment of clarity while working out with my friend Andrea (Mike's wife). I cannot participate in any weight loss challenge and I cannot get on the scale more then once a month for just a check in. It's abusive. It is. And I continue to do it. And I know you have heard this from me before. But apparently this self love thing is very hard for me to do. I don't really know why. I realize that from time to time Mike will need to check on progress in some fashion, but I don't need to know the numbers anymore. Even if they are positive. My goals need to stay oriented around fitness and performance. Not weight loss. Hopefully that will be a benefit of any success I have with my fitness achievements, but I have to change my goal....even though I haven't met my original weight loss goal. (I am 15 pounds away from where I want to be and have been for about 2 years now. That's one hell of a plateau by the way.) The difference of how I felt emotionally at the end of the weight loss challenge, verses how I felt at the end of the training session where I had to try to finish in a certain amount of time (and did by the way!) is staggering. And telling.
So I don't know what the scale says today. Today it doesn't matter. Today I am going to get some very light walking in and then curl up on the couch with some tea and nurse my sore throat.