Thursday, February 21, 2013

Self Doubt

 I had a rotten day today.  From start to finish it just was a bad day.  Not the kids.  The kids were great. 

So I went to spin class looking forward to just killing myself and leaving it all there.  Got myself all set up, did some nice slow stretching, and jumped on. 

There was a ripped woman behind me.  She was chatting away with some of the other people.  THen our instructor got there and ripped lady introduced herself.  She's a new spin instructor at the Y.  My heart sank a little bit.  I have been trying to build myself up to ask about training and becoming a spin instructor.  I have been doubting if I am ready for something like that or if I still have more work I need to do for myself first. 

The two thoughts that kept going through my mind were a) I don't look anywhere near as fit as this woman so I was probably jumping the gun on actually becoming an instructor. And b) Even if it were possible I don't think I'll be able to get a working membership to help me pay for the training if they've already hired another instructor.

I don't know. Spent the whole ride full of doubt and upset and confused.  Didn't get what I needed to get out of it.  Worked hard.  Sweat.  Burned lots of calories.  But did not walk out feeling better then when I walked in.  Which was what I really needed tonight.

1 comment:

  1. If YOU want to do it, DO it. You CAN do it, and you SHOULD do it.

    It doesn't matter if you look as strong as someone else, what matters is you ARE as strong. You can do anything you set your mind do!