The thing that I am working on the most right now is how to balance. It's been the step I have been most afraid to take. Because I don't balance. I'm an all or nothing kind of girl. All in or all out. I have known that eventually, when I had my feet on solid ground, I would need to learn this skill.
I take a lot of flack from time to time because I do post a lot about my journey on facebook. And I do have two heart rate monitors, one for exercise and one for the day, and I am religious about my food planning and tracking. And I have not worked out less then five days a week for at least the past year and a half. That's a lot to focus on and not drop any balls. But I haven't dropped any.
This week I have taken a few steps toward learning the art of balance. I won't go into details because, well because I'm not sure if anyone is reading this or gives a shit anyway. But it has been a good week. I continue to train, and train hard. But I have allowed myself to loosen the strings just a bit. It's always been a slippery slope for me and I have been so stringent with myself for fear of sliding right on down. But i know myself better then I think I ever have. I know that I am not going to fall down the mountain if I have a small treat. I know it may mean I have to train just a little bit harder the next day; but that's ok. That's balance. That's learning how to make choices.
This is no longer about reaching a goal weight. It's about changing me. I am better with me.
